


Nothing but Death

by mrs_squirrel_chester



Category: Supernatural
Genre: AU!Dean Winchester, AU!Sam Winchester, Angst, Dean Winchester Angst, F/M, Mental Breakdown, Mental Health Issues, NSFW, OFC - Freeform, OFC NSFW, OFC SMUT, Original Female Character - Freeform, Sam Winchester Angst, Sam Winchester nsfw, Schizophrenia, Smut, sam winchester smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-09
Updated: 2016-03-20
Packaged: 2018-05-19 06:13:45
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 9
Words: 12,918
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5956666
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mrs_squirrel_chester/pseuds/mrs_squirrel_chester
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>While Sam and Dean hunt monsters around the country, Kelsey follows them on their journey, forming an unusual connection with one of the brothers.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

“Would ya hurry it up, Sammy? We don’t got all night.”

Sam rolled his eyes at Dean’s impatient tone. “You know, this would go a lot faster if you’d help.”

“Where’s the fun in that? Besides, someone’s gotta keep an eye out.”

“If you’da kept a better eye out last time, we wouldn’t have to watch our asses so close.”

“Shut up and dig, bitch.”

“Jerk.” After wiping the sweat from his brow, Sam pushed the shovel into the dirt with a grunt.

Digging up graves was hard work. Digging up graves in the middle of the night so you could salt and burn a corpse while the cops were looking for you was even harder. He only had his brother to thank for that.

Dean said he’d watch the front of the bar while Sam took care of the shape shifter in the alley. He should have known better. Dean in a bar surrounded by beer and hot women was like handing food to a starving man. It was an all-Dean- could-eat buffet, and boy did he go to town.

Sam didn’t even get a chance to wash the blood from his hands before the alley was bathed in red and blue flashing lights. As if that weren’t bad enough, when he vaulted over the fence, he scraped the palm of his hand on some exposed wire. So not only was he seen by a couple of rookie cops, they now had a sample of his blood. He could have killed his brother that night.

After finally unearthing the coffin, Sam opened the lid, holding his nose as he fell on his ass. “Fuck, that’s ripe.”

“What d’ya expect, little brother?”

Narrowing his eyes, Sam tossed the shovel out of the grave as he stood. “Shut up and get the salt.”

“Someone’s wearing their bossy underwear tonight.” Dean covered the rotting corpse in salt, purifying the bones that were to be set ablaze.

Lighter fluid streamed out of the bottle, splashing as it hit home. Sam pulled a box of matches from his back pocket, striking several of them on the igniter strip before tossing them into the grave. The whoosh  of the flames as they came to life was almost intoxicating.

The fire pushed Sam’s hair off his forehead as the brothers watched, making absolutely sure that the body was destroyed. It was the last thing on their checklist of things to burn so the ghost of Emily Franks could finally be put to rest. She was only sixteen when she died, head on collision with a drunk driver. Of course she had unfinished business. But that unfinished business quickly turned to revenge, and as much as the asshole deserved to be punished, having a ghost force alcohol down your throat until you choked wasn’t the way to go.

“We better jet.” Dean nodded, pulling Sam’s attention from the dancing flames.

The cemetery guard they had successfully bypassed was making his rounds, sweeping his flashlight from side to side. It wouldn’t take long for the crackling fire to capture his attention.

Sam shoved everything into the duffel while Dean grabbed the shovel. They pushed away from the burning corpse just when the guard gave a surprised shout.

* * *

**_Police Search For Answers_ **

_The body of car dealer, Anthony Vicks was discovered behind Mick’s Tavern last month after someone called 911, saying they heard shouts for help. The brutality of the murder has everyone worried, and rightly so. Anthony had been stabbed in the chest a staggering fifteen times before the police showed up at the scene._

_Sheriff Roberts made a statement this morning._

_“I ask that the citizens of Laredo remain vigilant while we continue to search for the killer. We will leave no stone unturned, no tip will go unchecked. We **will** find who did this.”_

_Anthony Vick’s family has set up a $5,000 reward for any information leading to the arrest and conviction of the killer._

_If you have seen or heard anything suspicious, the police have set up a hot line:_

Kelsey set the newspaper on the table, running her fingers gingerly over the article. She had just begun to think she’d never hear from him again. She should’ve known better, he couldn’t go too long between kills. He was a hunter after all, ridding the world of the evil that infested it.

After cutting the article out, she opened the blue leather scrapbook and glued it carefully onto the empty page. Feeling sentimental, Kelsey flipped to the very first page where a small, one paragraph article was displayed. That was the first time she met him. That was the first time she knew who she would spend the rest of her life with.


	2. Chapter 2

Killing the engine, Kelsey took one final look at her reflection in the visor mirror. A few strands of her black hair had come loose, but all it took was a damp fingertip to put them back in their place. She grabbed her cellphone, notebook, and fake journalist credentials before getting out of the car. 

The police station was humming with activity when she entered. Officers and Detectives were busy taking phone calls and relaying information about the murder of Anthony Vicks.

An aging officer smiled as she approached, smoothing the wrinkles from her blazer. “Good afternoon. How can I help you?”

“I have an appointment with Sheriff Roberts. My name is Kelsey Bronte, and I’m with the Austin Chronicle.”

The officer glanced at the credentials, comparing it with the name on the Sheriff’s schedule. “Welcome to Laredo. If you’ll have a seat, I’ll let him know you’re here.”

Thanking the officer, Kelsey sat on the cushioned bench, crossing her legs at the ankles to keep her foot from twitching nervously. She had been doing this for almost two years now, one would think all of her nervous ticks would be under control. But it didn’t matter how many times she had done something like this, her heart stuttered at the prospect of getting busted.

“Miss Bronte?”

Kelsey stood, shaking the hand offered to her. “Sheriff Roberts, thank you for taking the time to meet with me.”

“It’s no problem. Please, follow me.”

* * *

Sam stretched his arms over his head, working out the knots that had started to form behind his shoulder blades. Next was his neck. Rolling it, he loosened the tight muscles, and holding his chin between his thumb and forefinger, he gave a quick push.

Dean cringed at the pop of his brother’s neck. “Jesus. You’re gonna snap your neck one of these days.”

“Whatever. It feels good.”

“Masochist.”

With a brow arched, Sam looked at his brother over his laptop. “Let me guess. Word of the day dictionary?”

“Shut up.” A balled up napkin was lobbed across the table with a chuckle.

Sam watched as it bounced onto the floor. “You’re picking that up, you know.”

“You gonna make me?”

“The thought is awfully tempting. If we didn’t have a case, I might just take you up on that offer.”

Dean leaned forward, resting his elbows on the table. “What’cha got, little brother?”

Sam spun the laptop around. “George Daniels says that his business was vandalized.”

“So? Happens all the time.”

“From the inside out with no alarms tripped? All the doors and windows were locked and nothing was caught on camera, just static. Guy came in to work the next day and everything was gone.”

Dean sat back and crossed his arms. “We talking money?”

With a wry chuckle, Sam mirrored his brother, kicking his long legs out, crossing his ankles. “That’s the thing. Daniels deposited everything in the bank that night. There was no money, no valuables; nothing of monetary value was there to be taken.”

“Then what was taken?”

“You name it. Desks, chairs, pens and pencils. Hell, even the toilet was gone.”

Dean scoffed, running a hand over the back of his neck. “What the hell would do that?”

“I don’t know, but I think it’s worth a look.”

* * *

Back at the motel, Kelsey changed into shorts and an over-sized t-shirt that hung to her knees. Sitting at the small table, she went over her notes from the interview, comparing them with a copy of the autopsy report she managed to swipe.

 _Anthony Vicks, single at 35, stabbed 15 times in the chest._  
Multiple witnesses remember seeing a man following Anthony out of the bar.  
Assailant had been seen following the victim around town for several days before attack.

 _Assailant described as:_  
     _Between 5′10″ and 6′5″ in height_  
     Between 25 and 30 years old  
     Shaggy brown hair  
     Dark eyes  
     Dressed in jeans, blue and white plaid shirt, blue jacket

 _Weapon was a knife, approximately six inches in length._  
     Victim had defensive wounds  
     Lacerations on cheekbones and nose  
     Cuts and bruises on knuckles  
     Bruises on chest and stomach

Pencil in hand, Kelsey started to sketch as she read. Graphite scratched against paper, and it wasn’t long before a face began to take shape.

She gave him a wide forehead, covered partially by shaggy, almost wavy hair. Dark eyebrows sat above wide, thick lashed eyes, casting shadows over his eyes and cheekbones. The report said his eyes were dark, but Kelsey felt differently about that, so she skimmed the pencil over the paper, coloring them grey until she found out otherwise.

With nothing more to go on, the sketch sat unfinished while Kelsey stared into his eyes. Her stomach flipped lazily when she thought about how close she was getting to finally meeting him.

The hair on the back of her neck stood when the alert on her laptop chirped. Clicking on the small box, the browser opened, pulling up an article about a body being dug up and burned.

“I’m coming, baby.”


	3. Chapter 3

“So get this,” Sam snapped his fingers to get his brother’s attention. “Turns out Daniels has quite the record.”

“Oh yeah? Lemme see.” Dean turned the chair around, straddling it, and read what was on the computer screen. His lips moved as he read silently to himself, running a hand through his hair when he got to the part that seemed to excite Sam. “God damn.”

Sam switched tabs on the browser, pulling up a newspaper article that was dated two months later. “That’s not all.”

Emerald and amber eyes flicked back and forth, taking in all the information Sam had dug up. They’d had no idea what they were dealing with when they pulled into town, but three hours of breaking into restricted databases sure had its perks.

_George Daniels walked out of the courthouse a free man after the six month long trial. His lawyer requested that even though his client was found not guilty, that the record be either expunged or sealed. Judge McArthur ruled in favor of the latter, sealing the record._

_Needless to say, the outcome wasn’t what the prosecution expected. The charges of embezzlement seemed to stick in the beginning, but the opposing attorney put up a strong defense, punching holes in the case one witness, and one piece of evidence at a time._

_Unfortunately for Mrs. Morris, that meant going back and rebuilding her business from the ground up. Unable to get her feet beneath her, she committed suicide one month after the verdict was given._

“Vengeful spirit?”

Sam shook his head as he leaned back. “That or a poltergeist. Look where she killed herself.”

_The body of Mrs. Morris was found by George Daniels outside of his work early this morning. Detectives have not stated whether or not Mr. Daniels is a suspect at this time._

* * *

Standing in the medical examiner’s office, Kelsey ran a shaking hand through her hair, thankful she had decided to wear it down today. It hadn’t taken her long to get to the small town, a couple of nights spent behind the wheel rather than a motel bed or the backseat of her car. It wasn’t like she was sleeping much nowadays, anyway. Whenever she did manage to turn off her brain for longer than five minutes, she dreamt, and those dreams were anything but lollipops and rainbows.

_“Ms. Rivera,” Professor Landers barked. “Do you, or do you not, know the answer?”_

_Kelsey’s vision snapped into focus. She swallowed hard at the weight of her classmate’s judging stares. “Ummm, c - can you repeat the question?”_

_Landers ground his teeth. “According to Brunvand, the legend of the vanishing hitchhiker evolved from earlier European stories, usually about travelers on horseback. Which ancient Hawaiian volcano goddess did the hitchhiker become associated with?”_

_Her hand shook until the pen fell from her fingers, clattering to the floor with a deafening **crack**. “I uh…,” the pages stuck together as Kelsey tried flipping through the pages. “I d - don’t -”_

_“Come on, Ms. Rivera. We haven’t got all day.”_

_Several fellow students began murmuring amongst themselves, while others began to chuckle._

_Kelsey rubbed at the back of her neck as she continued to stutter, still unable to turn the pages that were stuck together as if someone had covered her pages with glue._

_The walls began to shake and tremble, sending clouds of sheet rock into the room as they inched closer and closer._

_“Do you know the answer?” Professor Landers crossed his legs at the ankles as he sat on the edge of his desk._

_“Pele.” The harsh whisper came from the person sitting behind her._

_Kelsey tried to repeat the answer, but her tongue felt as if it were swollen. A cloud of dust burst in her face just as she took a breath. She covered her mouth as she started to cough, choking when her throat closed. She tried to tell her neighbor that she couldn’t breathe, but nothing came out._

_“Ms. Rivera, are you alright?” Landers was making his way up the stairs._

_Shaking her head, Kelsey stood, and with a hand over her mouth, she burst through the back door, all but racing into the hallway where cool air hit her face._

_As soon as the door slammed shut, Kelsey could breathe properly. Leaning her forehead against the concrete wall, she stared at the floor until her lungs didn’t ache._

“Ms. Bronte? Are you alright?” A concerned medical examiner had a hand on her shoulder.

Giving a firm mental shake, Kelsey blinked rapidly. “Sorry about that. Must have zoned out.”

“How is it that I can help the Austin Chronicle?”

“I’m here about Emily Franks.”

The ME, whose name Kelsey suddenly forgot, rubbed a hand over her face. “I’ve got nothing to say about that poor girl.”

“Was there anything about her remains that seemed… off?” Kelsey trailed the ME into her office.

She spun around on the heel of her sneakered foot. “Excuse me?”

 _Senior Medical Examiner Karen Murphy_ was on the nameplate. “Dr. Murphy, I received a tip that this is more than just the stereotypical grave robbery.”

“Oh really. You heard all about that in Austin.”

Kelsey gulped and worked to keep the phone in her hand steady. She was trying to record the conversation without being obvious about it. “San Diego isn’t that far from Austin.”

Pulling in a deep breath through her nose, Karen sat on the edge of her desk. “Initial investigation turned up very little about Emily. It just looked like someone had dug up her grave and set her remains on fire.”

“But then what happened?” Kelsey tried not to sound excited.

“I remembered that a few years back, there was a string of grave robberies. Best we could tell, nothing was removed from the graves.”

Kelsey vaguely remembered reading about them. “So what was it that changed your mind?”

“We ran a mass spec on the bones, found residue that was a mixture between salt and lighter fluid.”

“Is that what happened here?”

“Yes.”

* * *

Dean shifted the car into park before killing the engine. “You interview Daniels, I’ll go in and look for anything hinky.”

Sam nodded at his brother as they emerged from the car. The youngest Winchester removed a black leather bi-fold from an inside pocket of his suit jacket. “Mr. Daniels, I’m Agent Harrison with the FBI. Thank you for agreeing to meet with me.”

“Sure thing. Not sure why the feds care.”

“Just following orders. What can you tell me about what happened?” Sam turned so that Daniels wouldn’t see Dean slipping past the _**POLICE LINE DO NOT CROSS**_ tape.

“Got the nightly deposit ready, armed the security system, and locked up before I left. Dropped the money at the bank around 10, went home, and went to bed after watching the news.”

Sam made notes in a small notebook, nodding as Daniels talked. “And you didn’t notice anything… off?”

“What do you mean?”

“Cold spots, strange smells, seeing something out of the corner of your eye.”

Daniels furrowed his brows. “What kind of questions are those?”

“Just answer them.” Sam’s voice was a little sterner than he intended.

“Alright, alright. Um… I don’t really know.”

“It’s your place of business, Mr. Daniels. You’re here for fifteen hours every day, and you want me to believe that you haven’t noticed anything?”

George shuffled his feet, dropping his eyes to the black tar. “You won’t believe me.”

“I’m the one that asked the ‘weird’ questions, didn’t I?”

“Fine. Ever since that lady killed herself -”

“Mrs. Morris?”

“Yeah, her. Ever since then, I had the feeling that someone was following me.”

“What else?”

He shifted again, shoving a hand through his hair as he did. “Things started going missing. Nothing big. A stapler, some pens and pencils. You know, little things.”

“Until the other night.”

George nodded. “You think I’m crazy.”

“I most certainly do not.”

Dean poked his head around the back of the building, giving his brother a wave. “If you think of anything, call me.”

Sam handed over a falsified business card before tucking the notebook into a pocket and walking to his brother. “What’d you find?”

“EMF is off the charts.” As if to prove his point, Dean yanked the homemade detector from his pants pocket. The lights came to life as it whined shrilly.

“Only one question.”

“Yeah, what’s that?”

“Ghost or poltergeist?”

* * *

Kelsey tipped her head back, allowing the water to beat on her neck. She placed her hands against the slick tiles, bracing herself as her eyes fluttered closed.

_The psychotherapist crossed her black suit pant clad legs, showing off a very expensive pair of heels. “Kelsey, do you know why you’re here?”_

_“They say I’m sick.”_

_“Do you remember what it’s called?”_

_“Adult onset schizophrenia.”_

_She scratched the pen over the yellow paper. “Good. That’s good.”_

_“They say that I need help.”_

_“I can help you, Kelsey. But you have to want the help, and right now, it doesn’t sound like you want it.”_

_Kelsey groaned as the voices grew louder. “They say -”_

_“I don’t care what they say. What do you say?”_

_She tugged at a loose string on the hem of the dirt brown hoodie. Her brows furrowed in concentration. “It doesn’t matter what I say.”_

_“Of course it does, Kelsey.”_

_With a brow arched, Kelsey glared at the psychotherapist. “Really? Tell that to the nurse that decided I need a psych eval.”_

_Dr. Brown flipped through the folder on her lap. “Do you remember why the nurse called for an eval?”_

_“This is stupid.”_

_“Do you remember?”_

_Kelsey sighed heavily. “Yeah.”_

_“So what did you tell the nurse that night?”_

_“I said that there was something outside my house.”_

_More scratching of pen on paper before Dr. Brown met the spiteful gaze of her patient. “Not someone, but something.”_

_“Yes.”_

_“What do you think was outside your house?”_

_“I wasn’t imagining things!” Kelsey jumped up from the couch and began pacing in front of the window. “They’re out there, you know. All the things that go bump in the night. They’re out there. Watching us. Waiting until we’re alone.”_

_“And then what, Kelsey? What will they do?”_

_The condescending tone was really beginning to grate on Kelsey’s nerves. She whirled around to face the doctor, flinching as the almost delicate features of her face shifted subtly. “Y - you’re one of them!”_

_Dr. Brown watched with wide eyes as her patient sped across the room and tried opening the locked door. “Kelsey, please come and sit down.”_

_“NO! I - I have to get out of here! Please!” Her voice had gone from somewhat calm to extremely frightened. She was grunting as she turned the handle, screeching in frustration when it wouldn’t turn._

_The doctor went to her desk, pulling out a glass vial and syringe. The sounds Kelsey made while she struggled with the door, masked any noises the doctor might make as she approached from behind._

_The needle was pressed firmly into Kelsey’s neck, acting almost immediately, relaxing tense muscles as she slumped back against Dr. Brown._

Kelsey opened her eyes with a gasp. Her heart hammered against her chest as her surroundings slowly came into focus. The hot water had since gone cold, feeling like ice pellets against her chilled skin. Shivering, she turned off the water and climbed out of the shower, wrapping a thick towel around her shaking frame.

* * *

Dried off, wearing sweats and a t-shirt, Kelsey brought the laptop to life with a brush of her finger over the touch pad. Several tabs were open, each with an article about suspicious deaths or occurrences that have happened over the last month.

One in particular stood out as Kelsey read.

_George Daniels walked out of the courthouse a free man after the six month long trial. His lawyer requested that even though his client was found not guilty, that the record be either expunged or sealed. Judge McArthur ruled in favor of the latter, sealing the record._

_Needless to say, the outcome wasn’t what the prosecution expected. The charges of embezzlement seemed to stick in the beginning, but the opposing attorney put up a strong defense, punching holes in the case one witness, and piece of evidence at a time._

_Unfortunately for Mrs. Morris, that meant going back and rebuilding her business from the ground up. Unable to get her feet beneath her, she committed suicide one month after the verdict was placed._

_The body of Mrs. Morris was found by George Daniels outside of his work early this morning. Detectives have not stated whether or not Mr. Daniels is a suspect at this time._

Kelsey knew, without a shadow of a doubt, where she was headed next.

* * *

Armed with flashlights and the usual items one might need for a salt and burn, the brothers searched the cemetery for Mrs. Morris’s gravestone.

“Are you sure this is what we should be doin’?”

“You got any better ideas, Dean? Cuz I don’t know about you, but the last time I dealt with anything near the realm of a poltergeist, it was Mom.”

Dean stopped abruptly. “Don’t call her that.”

Sam almost plowed into the back of his older brother. “What?”

“A poltergeist, don’t call her that.”

Rolling his eyes, Sam sidestepped and continued to look at the gravestones. “You know, I’m over your alpha male, do as I say, bullshit. You sound just like dad.”

“Fuck you, Sammy.”

Ignoring his brother’s temper tantrum, Sam kept walking down the row of graves. There, at the end of the row, was Mrs. Morris’s grave.

Sam turned, ready to ask for the shovel, but Dean wasn’t there. “Fucking figures. Leave me to do the heavy lifting. ASSHOLE!”

* * *

Dean was sitting on the trunk of the Impala, leaning back, and staring at the stars. Without even looking, he held out a can of beer for his brother.

Sam tossed the heavy bag on the ground, groaning as his shoulder rotated roughly. Accepting the peace offering, he sat down next to Dean, careful not to scratch the paint. They sat there for almost an hour before saying anything.

“About earlier -”

Dean shook his head. “No chick flick moments.”

Sam chuckled before taking the last drink of beer. “Jerk.”

“Bitch.”


	4. Chapter 4

They should have left town after the salt and burn, but Dean insisted they _stay one more night, maybe hustle some folks_ while they were at it. Sam wasn’t really in the celebratory mode, so he nursed a couple of beers while his brother disappeared into the crowd of _easy prey._

Sam was just about to order another round when the doors opened, pushing the humidity of the night into the air conditioned bar. Accompanying the wind was a woman with long, thick, raven hair and crystal blue eyes that were borderline unnerving. Before taking another step, she scanned the crowd, eyes searching for someone.

Booted heels hit the wooden floor with purpose as she strode to the bar, placing her order. While she waited for her drink, she drummed dark red tipped fingers on the beaten and battered wood, her inquisitive gaze wandering around the remainder of the bar.

They settled on him for a heartbeat, just long enough to drift over his features before moving on to the next booth. Before Sam could even swallow the beer in his mouth, her eyes were back on him, widening ever so slightly before facing the bartender. Whatever she saw when she looked at him, surprised her, and that both intrigued and bothered him.

* * *

The drive from San Diego hadn’t taken as long as the GPS said it would, thanks, in part, to Kelsey’s lead foot. She knew that after wrapping up a case, he wouldn’t stay too long, leaving that very night if at all possible. So when she pulled into the bar, she was all but holding her breath as she took in its patrons.

The first half of the bar was reserved for throwing darts and hustling pool. With a partition on her left, she couldn’t really see the other side, so she strode in, aiming for the bar.

“What’ll it be, darlin’?”

“Whiskey. Double. Neat.”

While the too pretty bartender poured her drink, Kelsey was able to take in the remainder of the bar. Hoping she looked nonchalant, she rested her elbow on the bar and turned on her heel. Out of the six booths along the wall, five housed patrons. Two of those were couples that were a little too involved with each other for Kelsey’s liking. Two others were women, while a brunette male sat in the middle.

Chewing on her bottom lip, she took in everyone’s features, comparing them with the memorized sketch of half a man’s face. She knew that her sketch might not match perfectly, but it was something more than any cop or news reporter had given her.

Her eyes landed on the man in the middle booth for a moment before moving on to the couple that couldn’t take their hands off each other. She was just about to give up when something dawned on her. His eyes.

Before she knew what she was doing, she found herself staring into the dark orbs. The intensity in them took her breath away.

“That’ll be $10.”

Kelsey swallowed the amber liquid without so much as a hiss one might expect to hear from a woman drinking hard liquor, “keep ‘em comin’.”

* * *

He should get his brother and go. It was risky staying in the town after you’ve desecrated a grave. Not only that, there was a woman seated at the bar that kept looking at him. Sam was not going to deny that she was beautiful. Red tipped fingers threaded through her hair, tucking it behind her ears to reveal eyes that hit him like a physical blow; taking his breath away.

Despite all of that, something felt… off. She acted a little too interested, not like she was looking for some random guy to fuck.

 _Fuck it._ Sam slapped enough money on the table to cover his and Dean’s tab before sliding out of the booth. While holding her confused gaze, he clenched his jaw, and walked out the front door. 

* * *

Kelsey couldn’t tear her eyes away from the man as he stormed out of the bar. He looked pissed, like he wanted to hurt someone, but that didn’t stop her from finishing her drink, paying her tab, and walking out the front door.

The humidity smacked her in the face, almost sucking the air from her lungs. It took her eyes a moment to adjust to the foggy pitch that surrounded the small town. The scrape of her heel on the cement was the only sound made when someone grabbed her from behind and pushed her up against the wall.

“Who the fuck are you and what do you want?” he asked, pressing an odd looking blade against her neck.

With his face inches away from hers, she could smell the beer on his hot breath as it fanned against her skin. One would think when someone had a knife against your throat, you’d be scared, that you’d plead for your life, that you’d offer anything and everything in exchange for keeping your mouth shut. But not Kelsey.

“My name’s Kelsey, and you are?”

Her question hung thick between them as dark eyes darted back and forth. He wasn’t really sure why he answered her, “Sam.”

She repeated his name, loving the way it felt on her tongue, the way her voice wrapped around each letter. “Do you think you can let me go? You don’t have to worry, I’m not a shifter, vampire or demon.”

“What? Wh- why would I think that,” he worked hard to sound confused, but the only thing he was confused about was how she knew about those things.

“It’s what you do. You’re a hunter, right?” With a tilt of her head, her chin brushed against the serrated blade.

Kelsey’s actions and words confused Sam. She didn’t seem scared in the slightest, and he didn’t know if he should trust her or turn around and walk away. “How do you know that?”

She rested her hand on his, the one holding the blade, “I’ve seen the things that go bump in the night, Sam.”

“You a hunter?” His fingers flexed under her touch.

Biting her bottom lip, Kelsey traced her fingernails over Sam’s scarred knuckles, “not yet.”

Goosebumps broke out over the back of his neck when her nails grazed over his skin, but her words made him jump back. “No. You don’t want to do that.”

As he stepped back, Kelsey took a step forward so they remained the same distance apart, “but why not? You save people, Sam! You ask me, you’re a god damn hero.”

With the dagger sheathed, Sam ran a hand through his long hair, tugging on the ones on the nape of his neck. “No… no I’m not.”

Kelsey watched as Sam’s demeanor changed. Wide shoulders bowed over as if he were trying to withdraw into himself. Eyes that, despite the pitch, sparkled in the shitty lighting began to dim. A smooth forehead became wrinkled with worry and fear. Steady hands that had maimed and killed started to shake.

She rested a hand on his wrist, “Sam, you ok?”

His voice shook almost as much as his hands, “Dean… wh- where’s Dean? I… I haven’t… shit! What’ve I done?!”

Wracking her mind, Kelsey tried to picture the many articles that led her to this point in time. Was a duo mentioned? Her eye twitched almost painfully as she dug deeper, finally giving up when the warmth of pain spread up the back of her neck.

“Did he come with you? Is he in the bar?”

Sam’s eyes went wide at the suggestion, “yes! Yes, he did.”

There was something a little too frantic, a little too familiar about the way his eyes darted around, about the way his voice shook, about the way he was pulling away from her that made Kelsey swallow hard enough to hurt.

“Let’s go and find him then.”


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter includes implied SMUT.

Try as they might, Sam and Kelsey couldn’t find Dean in the bar. Sam even showed some of the patrons a picture on his phone, but their response was the same as the bartender’s, “sorry, man. Haven’t seen him around.” Not exactly what Sam wanted to hear.

The fear that threatened to swallow Sam whole began to do just that. His chest heaved as he tried to breathe, there was an itch on the back of his neck that began to travel into his hair, there was an ever growing pit in the bottom of his stomach, and it was like his mind was trying to keep something from him. Something important. Something that would break him in half if he opened the door.

Just as he was about to kick it down, Kelsey grabbed his hand. Her skin shockingly cool against his, “what about the motel? You think he could he have gone back?”

His tongue was thick, slurring words that he suddenly forgot. Giving up, he shrugged a large shoulder.

“Ok, Sam, it’s ok. How about we go and check it out, huh? I can drive, if you want. Or I can follow. It’s up to you.” There was something wrong with Sam. Even though it was all too familiar, it was something Kelsey couldn’t quite put her finger on. She would also never forgive herself if she left him now and something were to happen.

Dean would have his head on a silver platter if Sam let _anyone that ain’t me or you_ drive the precious Impala. “You,” he managed to stutter out.

* * *

The tall hunter all but kicked the door down when his shaking and sweaty hand couldn’t get the keycard to work. Kelsey took control of the card, holding it securely in the lock until the light flashed green with an echoing **_click_**.

Urgency clung to Sam’s vocal chords, strangling the name of his brother, “where are you?”

While Sam threw himself into the bathroom, Kelsey noted the almost packed duffels and not quite made bed. A laptop and a stack of books took up the majority of a small table, along with several opened cartons of Chinese take-out.

Stumbling out of the bathroom, Sam looked lost with wide, hazel and blue speckled eyes that were full of tears and panic. A hand was threaded into his hair, pulling on the thick strands painfully. “He… he’s not here. He’s gone. I don’t… I can’t… I swear I didn’t!”

Kelsey grabbed his face in hers, appreciating the bite of stubble a little too much for the situation they were in, and forced him to look at her, “I’m sure he’s fine.”

He tried to shake her hands from his face, but it didn’t work, especially since he liked the way the line of his jaw fit perfectly in the palms of her hands, “how do you know? Did you see him? DID YOU?!”

She could spot an anxiety attack a mile away and up close, it was even more alarming. She could try and talk him down, but all that seemed to do was throw gasoline on the fire. There was something else she could do, but given they had just met an hour ago, she wasn’t sure how he’d respond. Of course she’d like it; they were meant for each other, he just didn’t know it yet.

Without waiting for him to spiral further, she simultaneously pushed up to the balls of her feet and pulled him down by the back of his neck, kissing him firmly. Kelsey kept her eyes open, watched as his pupils expanded, as the panic bled away, as eyelids fluttered until they closed, fanning long lashes over his cheekbones.

Sam’s hands fell to the small of her back and fisted the thin shirt as he pulled her against him. He opened his mouth when her tongue stroked his bottom lip, followed by the sharp sting of her teeth. Their moans and tongues clashed together hungrily, desperation fueling the sudden and soul shaking desire.

When Kelsey kicked off her shoes and shucked her jacket, Sam grabbed her by the ass and upper thighs, lifting her with almost no effort. He sat on the edge of the bed, falling back with Kelsey straddling his strong thighs.

With his mind and senses filled with the blue eyed stranger, every fear of his missing brother was pushed from his thoughts.

* * *

Uncurling himself from Kelsey, Sam swiped a thumb across the screen of his brother’s face. He kept his voice to a whisper, “hold on a sec.” Shoving on a pair of boxers, he snuck into the bathroom.

“Where the _fuck_ are you?!”

“Jesus, little brother, calm down.”

“Answer me, Dean.”

“Don’t read me the riot act. Sounds like I’m not the only one that got laid tonight.” Sam could hear the smirk in his brother’s voice.

“You asshole. I about tore the bar apart lookin’ for you. No one said they saw ya.”

Dean chuckled, “why would they when I kicked their asses and took all their money?”

Running a hand over his face, Sam sat on the edge of the tub, “where are you?”

“Back at the bar. Get yer ass in gear, Sammy, I’m on my way.”

His head shot up, “why? What’d you do?”

“Why is it that I always gotta be the one to do somethin’?”

“Dean,” there was a tone to his voice that they both knew exactly what Dean could have done

“Alright, fine. She _might_ have had brother that also _might_ be a cop.”

Sam’s head dropped down, “fuuuuuck.”

The silence stretched for a moment until Dean cleared his throat, “so… we leavin’ or what?”

“Gimme ten.” The call was disconnected before his brother could demand it to be five minutes.

With a sigh, Sam pulled himself up, splashed cold water on his face, and managed to clean up the room without waking Kelsey. Everything was packed and sitting outside, but part of him felt guilty for leaving a women he just had sex with. A woman that went out of her way to help him in his time of need. A woman he was having a hell of a time not thinking about.

He scratched a note on a pad of paper provided by the motel, adding his cell number below his name. He shouldn’t have looked over his shoulder at her, because in that moment he felt a piece of him come alive that had been buried since Jess died.

The phone against his breast buzzed, “yeah, yeah, I’m comin’!”

* * *

With Dean behind the wheel, Sam stared out the window at the passing scenery. The landscape blurred by as the older Winchester pushed his Baby harder, but one thing stayed constant in Sam’s mind; the raven haired, blue eyed woman he left in the motel bed.

Kelsey said that she knew what went bump in the night, that she wasn’t yet a hunter, but she wanted to be; that Sam could tell. Fear didn’t cloud her eyes when a blade was against her throat. Rather, she almost appeared to enjoy it.

He sat there, getting lost in the smell and taste of Kelsey until Dean snapped his fingers loudly, “earth to Sammy. Come iiiiiiiin, Sammy.”

“Dude, what?”

“What’s her name?” Dean kept his eyes on his brother for longer than necessary, making Sam shift uncomfortably.

“Would you watch the fuckin’ road?”

“Only if you tell me her name,” Dean sing-songed, waggling his eyebrows at Sam.

The Impala started to drift over the yellow line, “KELSEY! Her name is Kelsey. Jeeeesus.”

With a chuckle and turn of his head, Dean steered his Baby back onto the tar, “so… she hot?”

“What’s with the twenty questions?”

“My brother gets laid for the first time in two years, there are things I gotta know.”

Rolling his eyes, Sam shook his head, and shrunk down into the seat, “no, you don’t gotta know nothin’. Just drive.”

“Touchy, touchy. Have it your way, little brother. Where we headed next?”

Sam pulled a newspaper clipping from inside his coat, “Tulsa.”

* * *

Kelsey stretched languildly, relishing in the ache that plagued certain muscles. It had been a long time since she bedded someone that made her sore in all the right places. Smirking, she rolled to her side, and ran a hand through the cool sheets.

When her mind registered that the bed was empty, her eyes flew open and she sat up, taking in the small motel room. Everything that had been there last night was now gone, save for her clothes.

After a quick shower, she pulled on her clothes angrily. She shouldn’t have fallen asleep last night, she should have gone out and gotten coffee; something… anything to stay awake.

Mentally berating herself, she almost missed the yellow tablet teetering on the edge of the night stand. She only saw it because she sat down on the bed to lace up her shoes.

_Thank you for helping me look for Dean and… taking my mind off him. Give me a call sometime. -Sam_

Without a second thought, Kelsey programmed Sam’s number into the slim phone. Smiling like the proverbial cat that ate the canary, she strutted out to her car. After firing up the engine, she took a long glance in the mirror, running a finger over the bite mark on the pulse point of her neck. It was deep, purple, and she could still feel the indents of each individual tooth. He had marked her, as she had done to him.

After she got back to her motel, she used her laptop and hacking abilities to activate the GPS in his phone. There’d be no unnecessary searching for him now. She knew exactly where he was going. All she had to do was grab a few items from the bathroom, give the key back to the sleazy manager, and she was back on the road.


	6. Chapter 6

“Dude… it’s too early to be up,” grimacing, Dean nursed a coffee while leaning against the hood of his Baby.

“It’s only early cuz you haven’t gone to bed.”

With a waggle of his eyebrows, Dean smirked, “oh, I went to bed.”

Sam rolled his eyes, huffing in frustration, “not the kind of bed I was referrin’ to.”

“Don’t judge me, little brother. You got a piece of ass the other night.”

“Shut up.” Sam pulled his phone out, checking for what felt like the hundredth time to see if he had missed her call.

“Call her, bro.”

“Hard to do when I didn’t get her number.”

Dean smirked again, clapping his brother on the shoulder, “first time back in the saddle’s always a rough one.”

“Shut up.”

“Come on, little brother. I’m just ribbin’ ya.”

Sam arched a brow high on his forehead, “yeah, well… stop.”

“She have a butter face?”

“I’m not saying it again, Dean. Shut up,” the two words were forced through clenched teeth.

It was Dean’s turn to roll his eyes, “yeah, she did. Hell of a body, I bet.”

Sam covered his ears and clamped his eyes shut, “shut up, shut up, SHUT UP!”

Dean’s laugh made Sam shudder, “always had a thing for them, didn’t ya, Sammy? Even Jessica wasn’t drop dead-”

“SHUT UUUUUP,” he roared until his throat burned.

“Fucking chill out. I’m just sayin’-”

With eyes still screwed shut, Sam threw his head back and screamed until Dean’s voice disappeared completely. It wasn’t until he couldn’t breathe that Sam opened his eyes and found that he was alone. Breathing heavily, he ran a hand through his more than likely disheveled hair and felt the phone buzz in his pocket.

His voice was still laced with anger when he answered, “I swear to God, Dean, if you don’t leave me alone-”

“Sorry to disappoint you.”

Kelsey’s voice was like a beacon in the dark, chasing away all the angry voices that screamed inside his head, “I was beginning to think you weren’t going to call.”

“And why wouldn’t I?”

Sam smirked, leaning against the spot his brother just vacated, “dunno.”

“Love ‘em and leave ‘em? I’m not that kinda girl, Sammy,” Kelsey chewed on her bottom lip.

“Good, that’s good to hear.”

“Wanna hear something… weird?”

“Midgets or strippers?” He couldn’t help but laugh at using his brother’s lame ass attempt at humor.

She laughed from her belly, “that’s one I haven’t heard before.”

“I have my moments.”

“I bet you do.”

The silence that stretched between them was anything but uncomfortable. Sam cleared his throat gently, “so… weird?”

“I’m in Tulsa.”

Sam stood from the Impala, “where are you staying?” He suddenly wanted to be with her, and not just because she was the most amazing sex he ever had. When he was with her he felt… different. All his worries and responsibilities seemed to disappear.

Everything except Dean. Speaking of which…

“-off Main Street.”

His heart began to pound in his chest, “uh… s- sure.”

“Sam, what’s wrong?” Kelsey was already sprinting out of the cheap motel.

He turned in a circle, stumbling as the ground shifted beneath his feet. “I… it’s Dean.”

“Tell me where you are.”

* * *

By the time Kelsey got to the almost empty parking lot, Sam was on his hands and knees; hair in his face while his chest heaved, arching his back painfully.

She pushed the hair out of his face as he looked up at her, “breathe. Just breathe.”

“B- b- but-”

It didn’t matter that pebbles bit into her knees, Kelsey knelt in front of Sam, holding his face in one hand while the other rested on his chest, “in through your nose, Sam. Copy me.”

Sam did as instructed; closing his eyes and drawing in air until he thought his lungs would explode. The air rushed out with a shuddering moan. Sure enough, after several long minutes on the ground, the knot in his chest began to loosen.

Bright eyes were what greeted him when his fluttered open. He sniffed loudly as embarrassment replaced the panic, “s- sorry.”

Kelsey wiped off her knees after Sam helped her off the ground, “don’t be. I’ve had my fair share panic attacks.”

“That what that was?”

“Looked like it to me. What happened?” Kelsey stood next to Sam, ass against a headlight.

Sam ran a tongue over his bottom teeth as his fingers carded through his hair, “just my brother being a dick.”

“Family, ain’t they grand?”

“Somethin’ like that.”

A comfortable silence fell between them as the pain finally bled away from Sam’s chest. He felt her gaze on him before she asking, “wanna grab a bite to eat?”

* * *

The conversation between Sam and Kelsey was kept light; favorite movies, books, authors, food; those kinds of things. It felt… easy, comfortable; like they had known each other for years instead of a couple of days.

To be fair, Kelsey had been following him around the country for two years, so yeah, she knew him better than he knew her. She almost didn’t tell him about that, but he took it all in stride when she explained why.

“My brother was killed by a poltergeist when I was ten.”

Sam’s brows furrowed as he covered her hand with his, “I’m so sorry.”

It had been a long time since Kelsey thought about him, so the emotion that erupted in her chest took her by surprise. Sniffling, she turned her hand over in his, “it’s ok, really. I just… it took me a long time to move past it.”

“What did your parents do, about the poltergeist?”

She chuckled bitterly, “besides getting me an appointment with a child therapist? Nothing. They didn’t believe me.”

“You can like your family-”

“But you don’t gotta love ‘em.”

They shared a chuckle as the server came with the bill, “whenever you’re ready.”

Kelsey grabbed the mint green and yellow piece of paper before the experienced hunter could, “lunch is on me.”

“That’s not-”

“You get drinks later,” with a wink thrown over her shoulder, Kelsey made her way up to the counter.

Sam took the opportunity to really appreciate the sway of her hips as she walked. Just as she disappeared around the partition, his phone buzzed loudly against the table. He let it ring a few times before answering, “yeah?”

“Still salty, little brother?”

It always irritated him that Dean never understood when he pushed things too far. “What d’ya want?”

“Got a lead on the vampire.”

Kelsey popped a green and white mint into her mouth as she came to a stop, “you rea- oh… sorry.”

Sam pulled the phone away to limit how much Dean could overhear, “it’s Dean. We, uh… got a lead on the case.”

Smiling shyly, she couldn’t help but notice that when the phone lit up as it was pulled away from Sam’s face, there was no ongoing call information; only the wallpaper of the week. It was then she realized there was more going on with Sam than just anxiety.

“You need an extra set of hands or eyes?”

Rolling his eyes at the shout of his brother, Sam relayed Kelsey’s question; nodding with tight lips, “meet you there.”

Sam stood tall and grabbed Kelsey’s hand, “not this time. It’s just… Dean doesn’t play well with others, if you catch my drift.”

“Sure… totally get it. Call me later?”

He bent at the waist, brushing some hair behind her ears before kissing her gently, “count on it.”


	7. Chapter 7

_Sam hated Halloween. The only reason he was going to the bar was because of-_

_“Sam!” Jess came around the corner wearing a sexy nurse costume and adjusting her hat, “get a move on, would you? We were supposed to be there fifteen minutes ago. Sam, you coming or what?”_

_With a heavy sigh, he poked his head out of the bathroom, “do I have to?”_

_“Yes! It’ll be fun.” Seeing that Sam was without a costume, Jess arched a brow, “and where’s your costume?”_

_Ducking his head, Sam chuckled, “you know how I feel about Halloween.”_

_“Doesn’t matter, we’re going. You need a night out and what better way to celebrate-”_

_Sam wrapped his arms around her waist, kissed her ear, and started walking to the bed, “I can think of plenty of ways to celebrate.”_

_“I’d love to really get down and celebrate with you, but I already promised-”_

_He rolled his eyes and grabbed her hand, “right… can’t upset Luis.”_

* * *

_If Halloween wasn’t enough of a turn off, the cheesy ass decorations were the icing on the proverbial cake. The bar they patroned was no exception; gargoyles and cobwebs lined the liquor dampened bar._

_As Luis joined the table, Jess raised a shot glass, “so here’s to Sam and his awesome LSAT victory.”_

_Never one to enjoy being the center of attention, Sam waved off his girlfriend, “all right, all right, it’s not that big a deal.”_

_“Yeah, he acts all humble, but he scored a 174!” It was obvious that Jessica was proud of him. Even after being together as long as they had, he still couldn’t get used to that feeling._

_Shots were taken, grimaces were made, and Luis draped an arm around the shoulders of Sam, “is that good?”_

_“Scary good,” finally, Jess took her drink._

_“So there you go. You are a first-round draft pick. You can go to any law school you want!”_

_Sam, answering Luis, didn’t take his eyes off his girlfriend, “actually, I got an interview here; Monday. If it goes okay I think I got a shot at a full ride next year._

_“Hey. It’s gonna go great,” Jess gave Sam a supportive smile._

_“It better.”_

_“How does it feel to be the golden boy of your family?”_

_Memories of many arguments with his father and brother played on a loop, “ah, they don’t know.”_

_“Oh, no, I would be gloating! Why not?”_

_“Because we’re not exactly the Bradys.”_

_Luis clapped Sam on the shoulder, “and I’m not exactly the Huxtables. More shots?”_

_Jess and Sam tried telling their friend no, but he already disappeared into the crowd. The chuckle bubbling in her throat died when she saw Sam’s hazel eyes flicking back and forth, “seriously, I’m proud of you. You’re gonna knock ‘em dead on Monday and you’re gonna get that full ride. I know it.”_

_“What would I do without you?”_

_“Crash and burn.”_

_Sam cupped her face in his hand and kissed her until Luis cleared his throat._

* * *

_The sound of a wood against wood pulled Sam from a dream. He rose from the bed, descended the stairs carefully, and spied the open window he **knew** Jessica closed earlier. At the far end of the hall, a dark figure strode past. _

_Part of him knew those shoulders, the upturned collar, but it couldn’t be… not here, not now._

_When the intruder entered the living room, Sam lunged; grabbing a leather-clad shoulder. His arm was knocked away mere seconds before a punch was thrown; which Sam easily avoided. The man grabbed Sam’s arm and swung him around; shoving him back with the momentum gained._

_Sam knew this fighting style; he had been trained in it from an early age, but he didn’t stop and address the man that broke into his home. Sam’s kick was blocked before he was pushed into another room._

_Just as the other man’s features fell into a beam of moonlight, he elbowed Sam in the face. Sam retaliated with a kick to his head, but he ducked; swinging on his descent. Sam might have blocked the punch, but the intruder used that to his advantage._

_Sam was knocked to the floor; a hand at his throat and wrist._

_“Whoa, easy, tiger.”_

_Breathing hard from exertion and shock, Sam stared at his older brother, “Dean? You scared the crap out of me!”_

_“That’s 'cause you’re out of practice.”_

_Grabbing Dean’s hand, Sam yanked on it and slammed his heel into the back of his brother’s head; sending him to the floor._

_“Or not. Get off of me.”_

_Rolling to his feet, Sam pulled Dean off the floor, “what the hell are you doing here?”_

_“Well, I was looking for a beer.”_

_“Seriously, what the hell are you doing here?”_

_“Okay. All right. We gotta talk.”_

_“Uh, the phone?”_

_Dean pinned his brother with an icy look, “if I’d'a called, would you have picked up?”_

_Light flooded the room, “Sam?”_

_Turning their heads in unison, both brothers greeted Jess with a smile; Sam’s more nervous than anything, “Jess, hey. Dean, this is my girlfriend, Jessica.”_

_Jess ignored the appreciative look from Dean, “wait, your brother Dean?”_

_While Sam nodded, Dean grinned and moved closer, “oh, I love the Smurfs. You know, I gotta tell you. You are completely out of my brother’s league.”_

_“Just let me put something on.”_

_“No, no, no, I wouldn’t dream of it. Seriously. Anyway, I gotta borrow your boyfriend here, talk about some private family business. But, uh, nice meeting you.”_

_Sam draped an arm over Jess’s shoulders, “no, whatever you want to say, you can say it in front of her.”_

_“Okay. Um, Dad hasn’t been home in a few days.”_

_“So he’s working overtime on a Miller Time shift. He’ll stumble back in sooner or later.”_

_He didn’t want to have to say it because he never truly believed what their father believed; that demons and werewolves roamed the earth._

_After their mother died, their dad was… different; understandably, to a point. Grieving the loss of a loved one was normal; anger, denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance were part of the framework that made up our learning to live with the one we lost. But ranting and raving about a demon with yellow eyes? That wasn’t normal._

_Not that Dean could have done or said anything to change John’s mind. He was hell-bent on ‘killing the bastard and anything else’ that stood in the way._

_Could Dean have left? Sure. Did he? Hell no. He had to watch out for his little brother, make sure their father didn’t do irreparable damage to Sammy. It didn’t take long for Dean to notice that Sam wasn’t just going along with it like he did; he actually believed as John did. And that was where Dean felt like a failure._

_Dean ducked his head before looking his brother dead in the eyes, “Dad’s on a **hunting** trip. And he hasn’t been home in a few days.”_

_Sam’s expression didn’t waver as he absorbed the news. “Jess, excuse us. We have to go outside.”_

* * *

_Sam sat in the Impala while Dean disappeared around the back of the house they tracked their father to. It was an old, dilapidated, shell of a home; but it was the perfect hideout. The last place anyone would come looking for John Winchester. Too bad his sons were the best hunters out there; after him of course._

_Using the skills he learned in the Marines, John made sure his sons could take care of themselves, hunt down anything they needed; trained ‘em right. There wasn’t anything those boys wouldn’t be prepared for._

_The hair on Sam’s neck stood as the air chilled. He blew out a breath and sure enough, it fogged in front of his face, “fuck.” The last thing they needed right now was a ghost. Maybe that’s what John was hunting._

_Something climbed into his lap, shoved him against the seat hard enough that it reclined. “Hold me. I’m so cold.”_

_The ghost flickered enough that Sam could make out a woman with dark hair. Still flickering, she bent over and kissed him roughly; she tasted like dirt and death. Her hand fell to his chest where she dipped ghostly fingers into him._

_Screaming into her mouth, he grasped for the keys; the engine roared angrily when he turned the ignition. Without looking, Sam shoved the car into gear and stomped on the gas pedal. The black car his brother called Baby soared into the house with a deafening crash._

* * *

_Inside the house, Sam called out, “Jess, you home?”_

_A plate of chocolate chip cookies and note were on the table. ‘Missed you! Love you!’ Never one to turn down Jess’s cooking, he picked one up, munching on it as he snuck into the bedroom._

_Listening to the almost hypnotizing sounds of the shower, Sam sat on the edge of the bed, shut his eyes, and flopped onto his back._

* * *

_Hot, angry flames licked the ceiling and walls, destroying everything it touched. Sam looked around for Jessica, but he couldn’t find her._

_Just as he was about to sit up, the door was kicked in; Dean had come back, “Sam!”_

_Shielding his face from the heat, Sam called out for Jess, but she didn’t answer the anguished cries._

_Dean ran into the bedroom, grabbing his brother off the bed, “Sam! We have to go!”_

_It’s then that Sam saw her, pinned to the ceiling like his mother had been 22 years ago, “No! No! Jess!”_

* * *

Sam woke with a strangled gasp. He was already sitting up and almost standing when his eyes flew open. He dropped to the bed and thrust a hand through his sweat-soaked hair. Staring at the shitty dated carpet, he tried to get his breathing under control, but the images of driving Dean’s car into the house and Jess burning to her death wouldn’t leave him alone.

The bed shifted and a cool hand brushed along his spine, “Sam?”

Kelsey’s voice was soft, thick with sleep, but it immediately calmed his racing heart. He turned, grabbing her hand in his as he did so, “sorry, Kelse. I didn’t mean to wake you.”

Blinking heavily, the woman in his bed pushed up to her elbow, “everythin’ ok?”

Even though he needed a shower, he needed to feel more than anything. He slid into bed, pulling her naked body against his as he moved, “it is now.”

Kelsey melted into him when he kissed her; open-mouthed and insistent.


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chapter is NSFW and contains rough shower sex with a choking kink.

Kelsey had been traveling with Sam for a few months and not once had she met his brother.

 _Gathering intel, hooking up,_ or _helping Bobby_ were his go-to answers.

Part of her wanted to believe him; that Dean was really 250 miles ahead and getting everything ready for his little brother. But then she remembered his cell phone. She had stolen glances when Sam was talking to Dean or when he would get a text.

Nothing. There were no incoming texts or calls from Dean. 

Not that Kelsey had gone digging through Sam’s phone, but there was definitely something going on with Sam. And not just the panic attacks and nightmares.

As she herself struggled from the disease, she knew the signs; Sam had adult onset schizophrenia. He had obviously gone untreated. But for how long and what was his breaking point?

While figuring out the enigma that was Sam was important, it wasn’t the be all to end all in their relationship. When Kelsey was with him she felt safe. She had seen him in action on several hunts, had followed that path of dead monsters for two years; he could take care of himself and anyone he cared about. No one had ever showed her that kind of… love before.

Love. That was a different emotion for Kelsey. For the last 24 years, her life had been filled with depression, anxiety, doubt, hate, self-destruction; anything and everything in between. So the first time she felt it blossom in her chest, quieting all the negativity with its warmth, she wasn’t sure what to do.

And then one night Sam looked at her with pine and gold eyes and said, “I love you.”

That was it. There was no turning away from him now, not that she wanted to. But now that she knew how he felt, she could finally put her feelings into words. Words she’d never said before. Words she knew were meant for him, and him alone.

They had just gone through and destroyed a nest of vampires, nasty ones that went after kids. With every hunt, Kelsey grew stronger and faster. So when one jumped on her back and tried ripping her throat out, she didn’t feel the ice cold fear in the bottom of her belly. Adrenaline coursed through her and before Sam could even think to come to her aid, the vamp was on the ground; its head rolling into the corner.

Kelsey was the first to shower, “hey, Sammy?”

After toeing off his boots, Sam shuffled into the bathroom, “yeah, babe.”

“Get yer ass in here.”

Before long, bubbles and hot water washed away the dried vampire blood and other muck that came from rolling around on the ground. Despite the fact the water had long since run clear, hands continued to roam over curves and muscles.

Dean once told Sam that shower sex was complicated, and sure, it could be. But if you knew what you were doing, like Sam did, shower sex was anything but complicated.

With legs wrapped around Sam’s waist, Kelsey’s back was plastered against the cool wall, sending waves of goosepimples over her skin. He sank into her, gritting his teeth and squeezing her hips hard enough that she’d be purple for days to come. Not that she minded. If anything, she encouraged him to be rough with her. 

_“I can take it,”_ she said on more than one occasion.

Her ass slapped against the tile and his balls followed suit as he set a pace that was sure enough to make one of them black out from the intensity. She started fluttering around him, clawing at his back with one hand while grabbing one of his with the other.

Kelsey pressed his hand on her neck so that his thumb and middle two fingers were on either side of her windpipe, “do it.”

They had always talked about choking, but the last thing Sam wanted to do was hurt her. She sensed his hesitation and pressed on his fingers, digging them into her skin, “I trust you.”

He squeezed. Squeezed until her eyes rolled back. Adrenaline roared through him and her ass slapped into the wall, almost cracking the tile.

Everything Kelsey felt became stronger, more intense. Sam’s chest hair felt like strands of silk against her breasts, the callouses on his hands dug into her skin like sandpaper, the vein on the underside of his cock pulsed harder with every thrust; it was almost too much to handle and her eyes welled up.

While she couldn’t breathe, he fucked her like crazy. Until her face turned red and her lips moved, whispering the one word that meant stop, “red.”

The dam inside her cracked, but didn’t break; she was so close she could almost taste it. She dropped a hand between them and squeezed her clit. Clearing her throat, she licked her lips and nodded, “again.”

Sam’s balls went tight as he choked her again. Watching her mouth fall open, her eyes roll back, as she fucked herself… fuck, it was hot. “Baby… you fucking better cum.”

One, two, three more squeezes to her clit and Kelsey came apart at the seams. White light pulsed behind her eyes and static burst in her ears. It was when black started to eat at her vision that Sam dropped his hand to her hip and pounded mercilessly into her until he came, grinding out a crude curse.

The water was cold by the time Sam and Kelsey emerged on shaking legs. They dried the other off and climbed into bed, falling asleep almost immediately.

* * *

_Sam sat in the Impala while Dean disappeared around the back of the house they tracked their father to. It was an old, dilapidated, shell of a home; but it was the perfect hideout. The last place anyone would come looking for John Winchester._

_He drummed his fingers against the steering wheel, sighing heavily because it shouldn’t be taking Dean this long. That and the fact that he had been ordered to stay in the car like he was a fucking five year old. He wanted to scream. And hit something… someone. How could they keep treating him like this? He was 22 for Christ sake._

_There was an itch on the back of his neck and it felt like his brain shifted inside his skull. He squeezed the back of his neck, digging fingernails deep into skin, and that’s when the hair on Sam’s neck stood as the air chilled._

_He blew out a shuddering breath and it fogged in front of his face, “fuck.” The last thing they needed right now was a ghost. Maybe that’s what John was huntin’._

_Something climbed into his lap, shoved him against the seat hard enough that it reclined. “Hold me. I’m so cold.”_

_The ghost flickered enough that Sam could make out a woman with dark hair. Still flickering, she bent over and kissed him roughly. She tasted like dirt, death, mildew… rancid. Her hand fell to his chest where she dipped ghostly fingers into him._

_Screaming into her mouth, he grasped for the keys, the engine roaring angrily when he turned the ignition. Without looking, Sam shoved the car into gear and stomped on the gas pedal. The black car his brother called Baby soared into the house with a deafening crash._

_After the dust settled, Sam groaned and moved the seat back to its upright and locked position. He forced the door open, coughing as he stumbled out, all but falling back against the Impala. It was dark inside the house, the only light coming from the headlights, and even that wasn’t the greatest._

_He swiped at his eyes, damp from trying to rid themselves of the dust, “DEAN!”_

_The house around him creaked and groaned, angry at him for having demolished it. He looked inside the car and found the cab empty, “good riddance, bitch.”_

_He stumbled around the back of the car, holding onto it so he didn’t fall, “where the fuck are you, Dean? DAD?”_

_Scanning the room, Sam could see that someone had been staying here at one point. Whether or not it was their dad or not, he didn’t know. He also didn’t know where Dean was. Surely he had heard the crash. Fuck, Dean was going to be pissed when he saw the shape his Baby was in._

_Smoke billowed from under the hood, the engine ticked, and a headlight flickered. It was when a breeze blew into the house that Sam found his brother. He walked slowly, slower than he’s ever walked before, to the front of the car where his brother was._

_Dean was hunched over the hood, chest pressed against it, arms flung out in front of him. His right cheek rested against the metal and blood streamed from his mouth and nose._

_With a shaking hand, Sam reached out to his brother, resting it on his shoulder, “Dean?” He shook his brother and the amulet Sam had given Dean for Christmas scraped against the hood with the movement, but Dean didn’t stir._

_Sam’s throat seized and it felt like all the air was sucked from the room. Falling to his knees, he looked up and found a pair of green eyes that no longer sparkled in irritation or laughter._

_This wasn’t happening. It couldn’t be._

_Sam stood tall and felt for a pulse, but there was nothing. Fuck. FUCK!_


	9. Chapter 9

_The crackling flames were hot against Sam’s face. Despite the fact that the fire destroyed his brother’s body, it was a welcome reprieve from the bitter wind at his back._

_A hunter’s funeral, that’s what Dean was getting. That way no demon could use his body against his will and it greatly reduced the chances of a haunting. Besides, if Sam didn’t do this, he’d never hear the end of it. John Winchester, while he did what he could and was the best father he could be, had a hard time letting things go; especially when he had taught you better._

_After the embers had been saturated with water and ashes buried, Sam climbed into the Impala and headed back to Jess._

* * *

_Once inside the house, Sam called out, “Jess, you home?”_

_A plate of chocolate chip cookies and note were on the table. ‘Missed you! Love you!’ Never one to turn down Jess’s cooking, he picked one up, munching on it as he snuck into the bedroom._

_Listening to the almost hypnotizing sounds of the shower, Sam sat on the edge of the bed, shut his eyes, and flopped onto his back. Tired from the long drive, he drifted off, the shower lulling him into a dreamless sleep._

_A hand on his face startled him awake. He jumped up and grabbed the hand, twisting it back and at an awkward angle._

_“Sam, it’s me!” Jess struggled against him, moving in his grip to try and dull the sharp pain in her wrist and shoulder._

_He released her instantly, “Jesus, Jess, you scared me.”_

_“I scared you? What the fuck, Sam? You damn near broke my wrist.” She moved it back and forth, hissing when pain erupted in the joint._

_“I’m sorry. I’m just… jumpy,” he sat down on the bed with a heavy sigh._

_She sat next to him, still cradling her wrist, “What happened? You find your dad?”_

_Irritation burned in his belly, “No. Old man wasn’t there.”_

_“I’m sorry, baby. Dean stay behind?”_

_“What’s with the twenty questions, huh?” Sam shot off the bed and paced back and forth, a hand shoved roughly through his hair._

_Jess stood in front of her boyfriend with eyebrows knitted together, “Is Dean ok?”_

_With a growl deep in his throat, Sam’s hand shot out and squeezed Jess’s throat, “You always did talk too much.”_

_Her eyes went wide with surprise and she grabbed at his wrist and hand. “Sam… wh- what are you doing? Let go.”_

_“I’ve had it with you and all of your questions. Always wanting to know if I’m ok, how you can help me! You can’t help me! ENOUGH!”_

_The argument on the tip of her tongue came out in a pained groan when he tightened his grip; crushing her windpipe. She clawed at him until he bled, tried kicking at him, but he shoved her back on the bed and straddled her waist. His arm shook as he choked her, the adrenaline pumping through him fast and hard. With a sneer, he gave one firm wrench of his wrist and snapped her neck._

_In an instant, Jess’s hands fell away and she stopped thrashing beneath him. Sam watched as the light in her soft eyes burned out. He stared down at her with the hatred pounding in his head growing duller with every beat of his heart. It wasn’t until he blinked heavily and his brain shifted that he realized what he had done._

_“Jess?” He cupped her face and pushed the damp curls off her forehead. Broken bones ground together as he turned her head._

_Checking for a pulse, he choked on a sob when he couldn’t find one; nothing, not even the faintest flutter of blood coursing through a vein beneath her soft skin. Fuck! Why did this keep happening?_

_He jumped off the bed and paced, all the while staring at his dead girlfriend. And that’s when the itch he couldn’t scratch on the back of his neck made its presence known. That’s when he knew what he had to do._

_Sam sat up with a jolt, choking on the black smoke as he took in the room around him. Hot, angry flames licked the ceiling and walls, destroying everything it touched. He looked around for Jessica, but she was nowhere to be found._

_Just as he was about to sit up, the door was kicked in; Dean had come back, “Sam!”_

_Shielding his face from the heat, Sam called out for Jess, but she didn’t answer the anguished cries._

_Dean ran into the bedroom, grabbing his brother off the bed, “Sam! We have to go!”_

_It was then that Sam saw her, pinned to the ceiling like his mother had been 22 years ago, “No! No! Jess!”_

* * *

Sam’s body jerked, waking Kelsey immediately. She switched on the lamp by the bed and with a hand on his shoulder, she gave a shake, “Sam, wake up, baby.”

He groaned and turned his face into the pillow, trying to burrow deeper.

Kelsey stood and walked into the bathroom. Returning with a cool, damp cloth. She set it on the back of his sweat-slicked neck and ran a hand through his hair, “Sammy, wake up. It’s just a nightmare.”

The fact that he actually answered, surprised her, “No it’s not.”

“What do you mean?” she dropped to the bed after he rolled to his back, draping an arm over his eyes.

He blew out a shuddering breath when the reality of everything he had done since that night two years ago crumbled down on him like a brick building.

When he didn’t answer, Kelsey placed a hand on his chest and felt his heart pound against her palm, “Sammy, you can tell me anything.”

“Not this. This is-”

She pulled his arm away and forced him to look at her, “It’s nothing I can’t handle.”

Sitting back against the headboard, Sam told Kelsey everything. Not the story she already knew, but a different one. A story where his mother wasn’t killed by demons. A story that didn’t include werewolves, vampires, and wendigos. The tale he told was a heart wrenching one where a mentally ill husband struggled with PTSD. That when his wife died in a tragic house fire, his mind broke, leading him to believe that it had been a demon with yellow eyes. A demon that had come to feed his blood to a six month old infant as part of a deal made several years prior. A demon that was trying to create an army.

“Y- you’re telling me that everything you’ve hunted isn’t real?” Kelsey had stood and paced sometime during Sam’s retelling of his childhood.

He stood tall in front of her, resting large hands on her shoulders, “I… I think so.”

“You think, Sam? N- no! It can’t **not** be real!” She pushed him away, thrusting shaking hands through her hair as the ground beneath her shifted violently. It didn’t make sense, this story Sam was weaving. Kelsey had seen these monsters, _killed_ these monsters he was now saying weren’t real.

His pupils blew out before becoming small as pinpricks. There was a buzzing in the back of his neck that slithered up into his brain, reaching out like long, thin fingers; encompassing the grey matter and pulsing, faster and harder with every beat of his heart. Sam grabbed her shoulders and crouched down to look her in the eyes, “No, I’m not saying that at all. I’m saying… I’m saying we should leave. You and me.”

She bit her bottom lip, nervously chewing on the split skin, “You want me to go with you?”

Lifting her chin with his fingers, he smiled shyly, “I can’t do this without you.”

Something inside Kelsey shifted and she stood straight, ready for the next hunt, ready for the next kill. “Where do you want to go?”

Sam kissed her, pulling back before they got distracted, “I’ll drive and you tell me where we should go.”

Excitement roared through Kelsey, “Yeah?”

“Gear up, baby. We got work to do.”


End file.
